As a youngster I often perceived the people that were three to four years older than me as really mature compared to me. When I started attending upper elementary at an age of 13, I thought the 9th graders (the 15 and 16 year olds) were scary and well, as already mentioned, much more mature than me. Funny thing, isn't it? 16 year olds are nothing but kids in the big picture. Naturally then, when I was 16, I saw 18 and 19 year olds as big boys and girls. I thought they were close to being adults with cars, real jobs and all. I was so wrong. I mean, some actually have aquired all those things at that age, but they are still far from being adults.
I am now 24. Twenty-friggin-four. Wow. The 18 year old me would consider that pretty adult. The current me, however, considers it pretty young. I like to think I'm smarter and more manly than ever before, puberty is also a thing of the friggin' past, but 24...I like to think of 24 as the new...err...18. It's so strange. Now I can see 30 year olds as equals to me. I have friends that are that age and we get along well. It just blows my mind sometimes. Age is such a peculiar thing indeed. According to a book I'm reading, the age of adolescence or youth in today's society (or at least in our western culture), can be from 15 to the late 20s or even stretch into the 30s. That actually gives me great relief. I'm really not that old.
According to the famous psychologist Erik H. Erikson we all go through something called psychosocial development. Erikson claims that there are eight different developmental stages for human beings, each with a new challenge to confront or master. The succesful mastering of the task at each stage will eventually make you complete as a person. Put differently; you will simply create your own personality by doing them. Failing to complete a task can lead to difficulties later in life. Here is an example of one of the eight stages in Eriksons theory.
The adolescent stage:
Psychosocial Crisis: Identity vs. Role Confusion
"The adolescent is newly concerned with how he or she appears to others. Superego identity is the accrued confidence that the outer sameness and continuity prepared in the future are matched by the sameness and continuity of one's meaning for oneself, as evidenced in the promise of a career. The ability to settle on a school or occupational identity is pleasant."
The adolescent is supposed to find his identity by, for example, expressing and arguing his different opinions and try to find where he stands on certain issues. The adolescent can identify with others or completely disagree with them. Naturally the social aspect is important here; does the adolescent agree with what his/her parents think or stand when it comes to such things as, for example, religion? That's just one example of many though. The adolescent is supposed to create some sort of image of who he/she is.
I bring this particular stage up cause I feel I haven't figured it out myself quite yet. Who am I? Who is hiding behind this face I'm wearing? I'm not completely lost here, I know myself quite well, but there are definitely areas where I'm uncertain of things. I often find it hard to decide things and decide where I stand. Sometimes I find I'm too easily persusaded by other people's opinions. Choosing the right education also proves harder than I had imagined. I hope that gets better with time...I have my own theory as to why this stage might be causing problems for me, but that's not something I'm going to lay out here now.
I hope I will get what I want from life. The last couple of years have definitely been better than some of the stuff I've gone through earlier, and hope is the one thing that has kept me going. The hope that things actually get better. Sometimes I just compare myself so easily to others my age. So many seem to have their lives sorted out - cars, bachelor and master degrees, permanent jobs and so on. I hate that society is the way it is. I wish we valued other things more; family, friends and silence. Nowadays money and a great career seems to be the most important thing. It's quite sad, really. I wish we all could just slow down and enjoy life. I do hope things get better. The stress of today's society doesn't do us any good.
